The Emotional Side of Writing

The Emotional Side of Writing

Writing is often described as a craft of words, but beneath the surface, it is an intensely emotional journey.  The emotional side of writing shapes every stage of a writer’s path, from the vulnerability of sharing a first draft to the resilience required to face rejection and criticism.  For many, the act of writing is not just about storytelling; it’s about confronting self-doubt, navigating imposter syndrome, and investing real feelings into every page.

The Emotional Side of Writing
The Emotional Side of Writing

These emotional challenges are universal, affecting writers at every level, whether they’re experimenting with genre boundaries, enduring the realities of publishing, or learning to transform criticism into growth.  By exploring the emotional side of writing, we uncover not only the obstacles that test our resolve but also the opportunities for personal and creative transformation that make the writing life so rewarding

The Emotional Side of Writing: Thick Skin and Rejection

Why Thick Skin Matters

On the emotional side of writing, developing thick skin is essential for any writer. Whether you’re penning your first draft or publishing your tenth novel.  The writing journey is filled with “slings and arrows”: harsh critiques, disappointing reviews, and the ever-present specter of self-doubt.  Every writer, no matter their experience, faces rejection from multiple sources, editors, readers, and even themselves.

The Many Faces of Rejection

Rejection in writing isn’t just about publishers turning down manuscripts. It starts with your editorial process.  Reading your first draft aloud or using text-to-speech software often reveals awkward phrasing or clunky dialogue you didn’t notice before. This self-rejection is critical; it’s how you grow and refine your voice.  After that, grammar checkers and audio playback can further expose weaknesses, forcing you to confront your work’s flaws before anyone else does.

Once your manuscript leaves your hands, the next wave of rejection comes from editors and beta readers, who return your work with red marks and blunt feedback.  Even after publication, the emotional side of writing continues: customer reviews can be brutal, and sometimes even mistaken or unfair.  Social media can amplify both praise and criticism, making it even more important to build resilience.

Pushing Genre Boundaries, With Respect

Writers are often tempted to push genre boundaries, experimenting with new forms or blending styles.  This creative risk-taking is part of the emotional side of writing, as it exposes you to even more potential rejection.  Some boundaries are worth pushing, like challenging clichés or introducing fresh perspectives.  Others, such as genre conventions that define reader expectations, require respect.  Striking the right balance means learning from feedback while staying true to your creative vision.

Turning Rejection Into Growth

The emotional side of writing teaches that every rejection is an opportunity for growth.  Constructive criticism, especially the kind that comes after a “comma, but…” in a review, is gold.  These insights help you improve, while ad hominem attacks should be ignored.  Over time, enduring and learning from rejection makes you a stronger, more adaptable writer.  One capable of pushing boundaries thoughtfully and with confidence.

The Emotional Side of Writing: Facing Imposter Syndrome

What Is Imposter Syndrome in the Writing Journey?

Imposter syndrome is a powerful emotional hurdle that nearly every writer faces at some point.  On the emotional side of writing, it’s that nagging feeling that you don’t belong, that you’re not “really” a writer, or that your successes are just luck.  This self-doubt can creep in whether you’re drafting your first story or publishing your tenth book.  As the video transcript highlights, imposter syndrome often emerges when you compare yourself to others’ successes, question your abilities, or face the daunting reality of the publishing world.

“Any time that you’re getting into something new, you are in the process of learning. You’re in the process of developing your skills. As we’re developing our skills, we’re gonna feel that imposter syndrome.”

Why Does Imposter Syndrome Matter on the Emotional Side of Writing?

Imposter syndrome isn’t just a passing feeling; it can stall your creative process and make you second-guess your choices.  On the emotional side of writing, it’s easy to look at bestsellers and wonder why you’re not “JK Rowling it up.”  The transcript reminds us that the odds are stacked against every new writer, and that’s normal.  The key is to recognize that feeling like an impostor is simply a sign you’re pushing yourself into new territory.

Pushing Genre Boundaries, And Respecting Them

One way to combat impostor syndrome is to experiment with your writing, including exploring new genres or blending genres in unexpected ways.  Pushing genre boundaries can help you find your unique voice and keep your writing fresh.  However, it’s also important to respect certain conventions, especially those that define reader expectations.  The emotional side of writing means balancing the courage to innovate with the wisdom to understand why some boundaries exist.

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome: Lessons from the Emotional Side of Writing

  • Acknowledge your learning curve: Every writer starts somewhere. The emotional side of writing is about accepting that growth takes time.
  • Embrace feedback: Constructive criticism, especially the “comma, but…” comments, is invaluable for improvement.
  • Celebrate small wins: Even earning your first $100 from a book is a major achievement in a crowded field.
  • Keep going: Like in martial arts, you’ll get knocked down, but getting back up is what matters most.

Final Thoughts: Turning Doubt into Growth

Imposter syndrome is a natural part of the emotional side of writing.  It signals that you’re learning, stretching, and growing as a creator.  By pushing some genre boundaries while respecting others, you can carve out your own space in the writing world.  Remember: every writer, no matter how successful, has felt like an impostor at some point.  Use that feeling as fuel to keep improving and to celebrate every milestone along the way.

The Emotional Side of Writing: The Reality of Publishing

Facing the Odds: Why Publishing Is Both Humbling and Rewarding

Publishing a book is often imagined as the triumphant finish line for writers, but the emotional side of writing becomes especially real when you hit “publish.”  The numbers alone can be daunting: with nearly 2 million new books released every year, your work becomes one among millions, making it more commodity than rarity.  Even after mastering writing, editing, and cover design, the act of publishing is a humbling experience; most books will not become instant bestsellers, and many will struggle to find even a handful of readers.

But this reality isn’t just about discouragement.

It’s about understanding the true landscape and setting realistic goals.  If you make even $100 from your book, you’re already in the top half-percent of all authors, a remarkable achievement in a crowded field.  Recognizing this can transform disappointment into pride and help you celebrate milestones that matter.

Pushing Genre Boundaries, And Respecting Them

The emotional side of writing also means grappling with the boundaries of genre.  Pushing genre limits can set your work apart, spark new trends, and help you find a unique voice.  Exploring cross-genre stories or blending unexpected elements can attract readers who are hungry for something fresh.  However, it’s crucial to respect the core expectations of your chosen genre.  Readers come to genres with certain hopes, whether it’s the promise of a happy ending in romance or the thrill of discovery in science fiction.

Striking a balance between innovation and tradition is key.  When you push boundaries thoughtfully, you invite readers to join you on a new journey without alienating those who love the familiar beats.  The emotional payoff comes from knowing you’ve contributed something original while honoring the genre’s heart.

Embracing Rejection and Building Resilience

Every step in publishing brings new forms of rejection: your critical eye, editors’ red marks, and the sometimes-brutal honesty of customer reviews.  The emotional side of writing is about learning to see these setbacks not as failures, but as opportunities for growth.  Constructive criticism, even when it stings, can be the catalyst for your best work.

By embracing the reality of publishing, respecting genre boundaries while daring to innovate, and building resilience in the face of rejection, you transform the emotional challenges of writing into powerful tools for your creative journey.

Emotional Side of Writing Thumbnail
Emotional Side of Writing Thumbnail

The Emotional Side of Writing: Constructive Criticism

Why Constructive Criticism Matters

On the emotional side of writing, few experiences are as transformative or as challenging as receiving constructive criticism.  For many writers, the journey is paved with feedback that can sting, but also offers the greatest growth opportunities.  It’s not just about weathering negative reviews or harsh edits; it’s about learning to recognize which critiques can genuinely elevate your work and which ones to let roll off your back.

The Art of Listening: “Comma, But…”

A key lesson from the transcript is to focus on the feedback that comes after the “comma, but…”  For example, a reader might say, “I liked it, but the pacing felt off.” Everything after that “but” is where the gold lies.  These comments are often found in three and four-star reviews, meaning the reader cared enough to offer suggestions, not just complaints.  This is constructive criticism in action: it’s actionable, specific, and, most importantly, it comes from someone who has invested time in your work.

“Everything after that ‘comma, but’ is what you’re targeting.  That’s not a rejection.  That’s constructive criticism.  They’ve actually invested the time, and that’s a potential customer for later.  You say ‘thank you’ and you’ll do your damnedest to incorporate it in the future.”

Pushing Genre Boundaries, With Respect

Embracing constructive criticism is also about knowing when to push genre boundaries and when to respect them.  Feedback can reveal where your story breaks new ground in exciting ways, or where it might confuse or alienate readers.  Use this insight to experiment thoughtfully: innovate where it serves your vision, but stay mindful of the core expectations that draw readers to your genre in the first place.

Turning Criticism Into Craft

  • Identify patterns: If multiple readers mention the same issue, it’s likely an area worth improving.
  • Distinguish noise from value: Ignore ad hominem attacks, but pay attention to thoughtful, detailed feedback.
  • Iterate and improve: Treat each round of constructive criticism as a chance to hone your voice and storytelling skills.

By embracing the emotional side of writing and viewing criticism as a tool, not a threat, you can transform setbacks into stepping stones.  The best writers aren’t those who avoid criticism, but those who learn from it, adapt, and keep pushing their craft forward.

Emotional Investment: The Heart of the Emotional Side of Writing

When we talk about the Emotional Side of Writing, few aspects are as personal or as challenging as emotional investment.  Writing isn’t just about crafting stories; it’s about pouring real feelings, memories, and sometimes even pain onto the page.  This investment is what makes stories resonate, but it can also make the process deeply taxing.

Why Emotional Investment Matters

Writers often find themselves emotionally entangled with their characters and plots.  As revealed in the video, sometimes you must write scenes that are difficult because they echo personal experiences or force you to harm characters you’ve come to care about.  This isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a testament to your commitment to authenticity.  The emotional side of writing means you’re not just telling a story; you’re living it alongside your characters.

Pushing Genre Boundaries, With Care

Exploring the emotional side of writing also means considering how far to push genre boundaries.  Challenging conventions can breathe new life into your work, allowing you to address tough topics or blend genres for a richer narrative.  However, it’s important to respect certain boundaries, especially those that protect readers’ trust and emotional safety.  Not every story needs to shock or break the mold; sometimes, honoring the expectations of your genre can deepen emotional impact by providing a familiar framework for readers to process complex feelings.

Balancing Emotional Toll and Creative Growth

Investing emotionally in your work can be exhausting, especially when scenes hit close to home.  Yet, this investment is also where growth happens.  Each emotionally charged scene you write helps you better understand your characters and yourself.  It’s okay to step back when a scene feels overwhelming, but don’t shy away from the hard parts.  The emotional side of writing is about embracing discomfort, learning from it, and using it to fuel more honest, powerful storytelling.

Practical Tips for Managing Emotional Investment

  • Acknowledge your feelings: Recognize when a scene or storyline is affecting you more than usual.
  • Set boundaries: Decide in advance how far you’re willing to go with certain topics or themes.
  • Take breaks: Give yourself permission to step away and recharge when writing becomes too intense.
  • Seek feedback: Sometimes, talking through a tough scene with a trusted reader or fellow writer can help you process and improve your work.

By understanding and respecting your emotional limits, you can harness the emotional side of writing to create stories that are not only compelling but also deeply meaningful, for both you and your readers.

Close:

The emotional side of writing is the invisible thread that ties every part of the writer’s journey together, from the sting of rejection and the challenge of impostor syndrome to the vulnerability of emotional investment and the transformative power of constructive criticism.  Developing thick skin isn’t just about surviving negative feedback; it’s about learning to see each critique, each setback, and each doubt as a stepping stone toward growth.  Facing rejection and impostor syndrome is not a sign of weakness, but proof that you are pushing your creative boundaries and striving for authenticity in your work.

Embracing The Emotional Side:

Embracing the emotional side of writing means accepting that discomfort, vulnerability, and uncertainty are part of the creative process.  It’s about finding resilience in the face of criticism, courage in the face of self-doubt, and pride in small victories that others may overlook.  By respecting genre boundaries while daring to innovate, and by investing emotionally in your stories without losing sight of your well-being, you transform writing from a solitary struggle into a journey of self-discovery and connection.

Ultimately, the emotional side of writing is what gives your stories depth, honesty, and the power to resonate with readers.  It’s not something to be avoided or minimized; it’s the heart of what makes writing meaningful, both for you and for those who share in your words.

The Product Of Emotion:

Probably the most difficult story I wrote is Symbiote.  It was emotionally difficult to go back to those intense places.

If you would like to read hints about where those emotions came from, you can read a little of that personal story HERE

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