Dirty Spanish Pick-Up Lines

Dirty Spanish Pick-Up Lines:

Buyer be very wary when you are practicing your dirty Spanish pick-up lines!

Probably, the fastest way to get slapped or humiliated out of the room is to try these and fall on your face.  It is very important to remember that phrases in Spanish, especially when referring to women, are emotionally three to five times as bad.

Please be careful when you are working with dirty lines.

Words of Warning for Spanish:

Words in Spanish carry a different weight between the male and female genders.

In the past, I have made the mistake of thinking that the words were the same in both directions.  Think of the woman being the gentler sex and if you cross that line you can offer grievous insult.  It is your fault if you catch that slap, or drink on your head!

One example is the word ‘Cochino’.  Years ago that was bantered around in Tex-Mex slang with me.  When I asked what it meant I was told, ‘gross’ or ‘dirty’.  I thought, “Okay, I put an ‘A’ at the end and it turns feminine and I can say it back at her.”

Yeah, not so much!

You are basically calling her a disgusting pig!

Be very careful what words you use.  Sometimes, they do not always translate well.  You can get yourself into trouble picking the wrong words, for the wrong recipient.

Words Meaning Different Things:

The bane of writers and OCD types like me is that words and phrases mean different things in Spanish across national origins.

Colombians, Mexicans, Puerto Ricans, and Cubans can literally say the same exact phrase and mean completely different things.

When I ask Catherine to go for ice cream, she expects a cold delicious treat.  But in the past, I have met Cuban women and I was told that in their dialect the whole ‘ice cream’ question is something of an inside joke for a successful evening in the sheets!

You will need to pay attention to the Spanish-speaking nationalities that you are talking to and tailor your responses appropriately.

Dirty Spanish Pick-Up Lines for Everyone!

¡Ey! ¿Eres basura? ¡Te sacaré! – (Hey! Are you garbage? I’ll take you out!)

¿Eres mi tarea? Porque no te lo estoy haciendo, pero definitivamente debería hacerlo. – (Are you my homework? Because I’m not doing you, but I definitely should be.)

¿Conseguiste esos pantalones con un 50 por ciento de descuento? Tienen 100 por ciento de descuento en mi casa. – (Did you get those pants for 50 percent off? They’re 100 percent off at my place.)

¿Hace calor aquí? ¿O eres solo tú? – (Is it hot in here? Or is it just you?)

¿Puedo pedirte un beso? Prometo que se lo devolveré. – (Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.)

Amo mi cama, pero prefiero estar en la tuya. – (I love my bed, but I’d rather be in yours.)

Creo que sufres de falta de vitamina mí. – (I think you’re suffering from a lack of vitamin me.)

Dirty Lines for Him:

¿Eres una chica ecológica? El condón que tengo en el bolsillo caduca mañana, así que ¿por qué no me ayudas a usarlo? – (Are you an eco-friendly kind of girl? The condom in my pocket expires tomorrow, so why don’t you help me use it?)

¿Qué hace una buena persona como tú en una mente sucia como la mía? – (What is a nice person like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?)

¿Tienes una pala? Porque te estoy cavando. – (Do you have a shovel? Because I’m digging you.)

¿Eres un examen? Porque te he estado estudiando como loco. – (Are you an exam? Because I have been studying you like crazy.)

¿Eres una fogata? Porque estás buena y quiero más. – (Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.)

Bonito vestido. ¿Puedo convencerte de que no lo hagas? – (Nice dress. Can I talk you out of it?)

Debes ser yogur porque quiero darte una cuchara. – (You must be yogurt because I want to spoon you.)

Dirty Lines For Her:

¿Es un bastón de caramelo en tu bolsillo o simplemente estás feliz de verme? – (Is that a candy cane in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?)

¿Eres un trampolín? Porque quiero rebotar sobre ti. – (Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.)

¿Puedes decirme a qué hora volverás a mi casa, por favor? – (Can you tell me what time you’ll come back to my place, please?)

¿Sabes qué guiña un ojo y luego jode como un tigre? (Guiño) – (You know what winks and then screws like a tiger? (Wink))

Detente, tírate y rueda, cariño. Estás a tope. – (Stop, drop, and roll, baby. You are on fire.)

Eres tan egoísta. Vas a tener ese cuerpo por el resto de tu vida y solo lo quiero por una noche. – (You are so selfish. You’re going to have that body for the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.)

Estoy al tanto de las cosas. ¿Te gustaría ser uno de ellos? – (I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?)